Me, Uncensored

Big Book of Jewish Fairy Tales

2011-03-29T23:46:00.003-05:00

Tonight on Facebook there was a little commentary going back and forth about a flat earth, Christianity, and someone posted a response about the world on the back of a turtle... which got me thinking about the creation myths.

Now, each ancient culture had its own guess as to how the earth had come about, and to hear them today, they all seem ludicrously outlandish (and yes, I include the one in the Bible among those.) So why do SO many Americans (specifically) and many people in many other parts of the world hold so steadfastly to the Jewish creation myth? They're not Jews, after all... and most Jews don't even believe (or especially not take literally) their ancestors' verbally-handed-down stories.

It's because of the Romans. The Romans saw the power of religion, and harnessed it. Because when you try to enslave a people with only the sword, all you enslave is their body. With religion as your weapon, you enslave their mind. Then you have countless armies at your disposal with no dissent, and your kingdom can grow exponentially while still maintaining complete control.

Something I'll bet you didn't know (and certainly wouldn't expect) Mormons to believe

2011-03-16T16:59:00.002-05:00

Mormons, like most other "Christians," are overwhelmingly Republican. In fact, when the Tea Party came about - a LOT of Mormons jumped proudly on that bandwagon. Now that Tea Party candidates have been elected and are creating tax cuts for businesses and the wealthy while eliminating tax cuts and services for the poor and elderly, as well as education in general - these Mormon tea-partiers are celebrating their victory and gladly trumpeting the implementation of the "virtues" promised by said tea-party politicians.

So it might surprise you to hear what the Mormon church has taught since the very earliest days of its existence:

"The time must come when we must obey that which has been revealed to us as the Order of Enoch, when there shall be no rich and no poor among the Latter-day Saints; when wealth will not be a temptation; when every man will love his neighbor as he does himself; when every man and woman will labor for the good of all as much as for self. That day must come, and we may as well prepare our hearts for it, brethren, for as wealth increases I see more and more a necessity for the institution of such an order. As wealth increases, luxury and extravagance have more power over us. The necessity for such an order is very great, and God, undoubtedly, in his own time and way, will inspire his servant [the prophet] to introduce it among the people." -George Q. Cannon - Journal of Discourses, 15:207.

Hmmm... that doesn't sound like the Tea Party virtues, at all. Sounds a lot more like Socialism. This also isn't one of those things the Church likes to pretend never existed (like polygamy,) either. In fact, it's included as one of the aspects of the Temple Ceremony - where Mormons are reminded of their covenants. It's called "The Law of Consecration" and it basically means you are required to give up anything and everything for the Church if they should ask for it. Of course, they're not asking for it now... just the usual 10% tithing like most other churches. But they COULD...

delusional?

2009-04-04T13:01:00.003-05:00

OK - so, if I didn't already sound like a snobby bitch before this post, I will now, but when I saw this I just couldn't let it go unnoticed.

So I was browsing around on one of the very numerous gay meat-market websites - not actually looking for anything really, just on the off-chance that I might find some unexpected diamond in the rough [yea, right] when I ran across this profile, which I clicked on. This individual had marked his body type as "Muscular." Uhhhmmmm... take a look at the picture he provided and see if you agree with him on that assessment of his physique:

I'm gonna put that down in my book as 'definitely NOT muscular'

that's what I get for hoping...

2009-02-10T08:42:00.003-06:00

I, of all people, should certainly know better than to get my hopes up in regard to a guy. Of course as soon as I did they were swiftly dashed.

In the course of any visit to the gym I see a great number of guys who I would love to get to know better, and would love to date - but of course, the ones I'm checking out are never checking me out so I just assume they are all straight. The ones I do see obviously checking me out are all fat and/or ugly. So one night I was out at the gay bars with my friends and I happen to notice a guy standing next to me [who is quite hunky] who seems familiar for some reason, but I can't quite put my finger on it... so I ask him "do you work out at 24Hr Fitness?" Yep. I had seen him at the gym. He hung out with me and my friends for most of the rest of that night, went dancing with us and everything. So I foolishly think there might be something there. Well, I gave him my card that night but he never called or emailed. I saw him at the gym here and there and we chatted [small talk.] He went on a business trip and I didn't see him for a few weeks. Then last night I saw him and chatted with him for a bit - and asked what he had going on. He was free, so I suggested we meet for coffee.

We met and the coversation was ok at first, but then as it went on there was a lot of awkward silence. I was trying to come up with stuff to talk about, but he wasn't really helping much. Finally he just said "well, thanks for meeting me" and as we walked out (in silence) he said "I'm sure I'll see you at the gym." I couldn't even think of anything to say. He was completely uninterested in me. It was basically a cold, hard, reject smackdown. I guess he only agreed to meet me to be polite. It probably would have been easier on me if he had just said, "no thanks, I'm really not that interested." Then at least I wouldn't have dared to hope that a date would turn out well...

So, after the super high of a great weekend with my travel group, there was this super low. I guess my only consolation is that I'm still able to feel sad and rejected. At least I can still feel that and know that I'm not completely dead inside. I guess if I felt nothing then that would mean I am basically just a zombie. Somehow I don't think that's far off, though... since I've never felt actual love, and any hope I might have had of ever finding any is long dead...

weekend adventures

2009-01-05T22:32:00.002-06:00

This past weekend was a good one. Approaching it, I had absolutely nothing at all planned, but ended up staying busy every day, all day.

It started Friday night, when I took my co-worker Alicia out to dinner for her birthday. Although her birthday was the day after Xmas, she was sick that day so we postponed it. It finally worked out for Friday, and we went to Chaucer's in Addison, where I had previously gone with my travel group. They've got a sushi happy hour, where everything is 1/2 price or cheaper. We tried quite a few different things, and learned which ones we liked and which ones we didn't. I was having a rough time with the chopsticks that night for some reason, too. [My previous chopstick use there was actually pretty good - couldn't figure out why I was failing.] Anyway, after eating sushi and talking for a while we headed out, contemplated the movies at the theater, but when there was nothing we wanted to see at a decent time, we ended up going down to the West Village. We got ice cream at Paciugo, and then wandered around the shops there. I got a cute and sassy T-Shirt for 1/2 off from the Lucky Jeans Store. I put it on right then and wore it the rest of the night. I also got a much needed 2009 wall calendar at Barnes & Noble [also 1/2 off there, score!] From there we went out to the gay clubs. We started off at Round-Up, where I ran into my friend Jeff. Alicia was dead-set on finding us both boyfriends right there. I found a worthy candidate, but he turned out to be in a relationship [the good ones are always taken.] Later on we went to S4, and went to watch the drag show. While waiting for it to start I saw a really cute guy, who I naturally assumed was straight [since that's how my gaydar works - if I like a guy, he's straight.] Alicia wouldn't agree with me - she maintained that he was gay, so I finally went over and asked him. Alicia was right. But if I am really attracted to a guy who IS gay, then he is invariably not interested in me. This was no exception. The guy made conversation to be polite, but after his friends came back from dancing he didn't feel compelled to talk to me again. Whateva...

The drag show was fun. The emcee was really on her game. I also ran into Vincent as I was going to the bathroom, and since I hadn't seen him for a while and Alicia needed to get going anyway we snuck out of the drag show early and chatted with Vincent on the balcony for a minute. He had a song he had been working on which he played for me on his mp3 player. It was a rough-cut, work-in-progress. Very 'Joy Division' and 'Bloc Party'. When I mentioned 'Bloc Party' Vincent was impishly indignant. He hadn't wanted his main influence to show through, but it did.

Saturday was a beautiful summer day. Literally. Even though it was January 3rd, the temperature got up into the high 70's [like 78] - some even said 83 degrees in the sun, so I went on a bike ride around White Rock Lake with Danny. I took my shirt off halfway. Afterward, Danny, Craig and I all went to lunch at Chipotle. Then I went home and took a nap for a while. In the evening I met Tony and Jayson at Cyclone Anaya's for dinner. The food was ok, but the service wasn't great.

From there we went to Round Up, and then on to JR's. It was on the balcony at JR's that the night got a lot more interesting for me. Tony, Jayson and I were all sitting/standing around talking when I notice in my peripheral vision a really cute guy with very nice arms come stand next to me and look out over the balcony to the street below. Now, whether he had seen me and came and stood there purposely, or if it was just a mere coincidence - remains to be seen, but he seemed somewhat familiar to me [the subconscious mind knew him from somewhere] so I turned to him and asked: "Do you work out at 24Hr Fitness?" "Yes," he says "at Preston and NW Hwy on the weekends and 635/MacArthur on the weekdays." That was it. I had seen him there, and I'm sure, lusted after him. We talked for a while there on the balcony, and when it came time to get in free at S4, he went with me, and continued hanging out and talking with me. Now, it's not often that a seemingly nice gay guy hangs out an talks to me, so this was really nice. He even went out and danced with me and Tony. Andy texted me from Round Up and told me to go over there. I was conflicted because the cute guy was at S4, but I eventually told Andy I'd be over, and I gave cute guy my card. As I gave it to him he said "I'm sure I'll see you at the gym" which meant he wasn't interested enough to use any of the contact information I had just given him, but I guess there was something similar to interest there... maybe? I mean, there had to be, right? Why else would he keep hanging out with me and even dance with me? We'll see, I guess. I know better than to get my hopes up.

Anyway, I went back over to Round Up and found Andy and Misty there, who had gone to the Trans-Siberian Orchestra concert earlier. We had fun dancing and Misty and Andy had a flirty thing going on. Long about 2am I decided my body had had enough and I headed home.

Sunday Bryan and I went down to Sam's place in Uptown and hung out naked. We watched south park for a little while, then we all got dressed and went to Village Burger for lunch. It was busy enough that we had to wait for a table. After we got back we watched the movie "Running With Scissors." It was fun, weird, and interesting. I had traded messages with Andy somewhat and Bryan and I went over to Andy's and we soaked and chatted in the hot tub there for a while.

In the eveing I went to my parents' house for our monthly family dinner get-together. It was fun hanging with the family for a little while. Then I went to pick up Chris from the airport after his holiday trip to Germany. It was fun to hear the stories from his trip... ripped pants [with no underwear] in the airport... lusting after the super-hot German boys... etc.

something I need to learn

2008-12-30T09:26:00.001-06:00

I saw this quote today and it's definitely something I need to learn and apply to myself:

If you limit your choices only to what seems possible or reasonable, you disconnect yourself from what you truly want, and all that is left is a compromise.
-Robert Fritz

Pope? More like poop. lol

2008-12-25T09:14:00.002-06:00

Not that I would ever give two shits about anything the Pope ever said, but this is a good article.

examining atheism

2008-12-24T23:44:00.003-06:00

Tonight was a good night - I hung out with my sister and her family, and my friend Alicia came along with me. We had good food, and fun. I played Xmas hymns and we all sang. We got the boys all hyped up about Santa and Xmas and whatnot. Of course the subject of Jesus was at the forefront, being Xmas eve and all, and at one point in the evening Alicia and my sister both were talking about going to church and soundly assured me: "you'll be back." Of course, I've never been really good at debate, because I can't come up with the right response on the spot. All I could do was shake my head and disagree with them with my usual smile. That's very much why I prefer writing as a debate forum because it gives me the proper time I need to formulate a good response. Anyway, later I thought of what it was I should have come back to them with:

"Why would I go back? What does religion possibly have to offer me?" The whole time I was in my religion growing up I was not only deeply unhappy, but for my entire adolescence and into young adulthood I was totally suicidal. The only lasting feeling that the church and its teachings instilled in me was an intense and very real hatred of myself.

Suicide notwithstanding, what else does the church offer that I need? They offer to tell me who I am, what friends I should have, what I should or shouldn't do or think. They offer their control. That's basically it. "Give yourself to the church and we'll get you into heaven."

Well... what if I have enough knowledge of what's good and bad and the wisdom to exercise control over myself accordingly? What if I don't need to worry about whether I'll get into heaven or not - what if it's enough for me to just live a good life and be a good person? That means I don't need some old man's interpretation of a 2,000 year old storybook to tell me how to live my life. I'm smarter than that. The Mormon's argument, though is that they have a current prophet receiving revelation direct from God today. Uh, so... that's still some old man telling me who I am, when I already figured out that what they were feeding me all those years was not only damaging and wrong, but it was also complete BULLSHIT. It was only once I sat back from the table and took an honest assessment that I realized that's what I had been served my whole life, and I was tired of swallowing it. It was loathsome and disgusting and I kinda knew that all along, but because I had been trained since birth to just keep eating, I had kept trying to convince myself that I could do it and be happy. Well, just like eating shit in real life, there's no happy ending there. It will never make you feel good, and once you see it for what it really is you will NEVER go back to eating it again! So yea, I will definitely NOT be going back for another serving of that load of turd.

Now, with that said... I do not begrudge people their right to believe, or judge people for their belief. If it makes them happy and they find fulfillment in it, go right ahead and feast at that banquet. For you it may very well be the ambrosia that feeds and nourishes your soul. I wish happiness for all people, and if religion is where you find it then by all means, enjoy it. HOWEVER, don't try to "win me back" or to feel sorry for me, though, because I have never been happier. I absolutely LOVE living my life! [Something I would have never said while still a believer in the church.] Every day is a grand new adventure filled with endless possibilities. Yea, there's the mundane routine of a job that's "just work" but that doesn't get me down - it's a necessary part of life. There are bills that need to be paid. Hopefully I'll eventually transition into something more fulfilling as a career, and I'm working on that one little by little...

Anyway, the point is that I am accountable to no one but myself, and that's good enough. If I do something that wrongs someone else, I feel REALLY bad for it. Not because I'm worried about how God will judge me, but because I know that I should be better than that. Not because I'm worried about whether I'll get into heaven or not, but because of how I would feel if the tables were turned. There are good things taught in religion, which have been taught through all religions and outside of religion as well. The Christian version of it comes from Jesus and is most often quoted "do unto others as you would have done to you." That's my rule, and I like to say I do a pretty good job of following it most of the time. Most Christians believe Jesus made that one up - that he was the first one to think of that. Sorry - but just like the mythology on which Christianity is based, that one has been around a lot longer.

there's still time!

2008-12-19T23:17:00.003-06:00

ok everyone - I saw a picture today of what I want for Xmas, so there's still time to get it for me! Here it is!

All I want for Xmas

2008-12-05T12:27:00.002-06:00

As an Atheist, X-mas [which I'm perfectly happy to call Xmas - since I have no problem in {said with whiney Christian voice} "taking the Christ out of Christmas"] has little meaning to me. It stopped being fun a long time ago, when I stopped getting any more than one or two feeble presents. I still give stuff to people - mainly family - but the old adage " 'tis better to give than receive" really is just BS. Everyone loves to get stuff. My family has a gift exchange program whereby each 'family unit' gives to another. My sister in Arizona and her husband have my name and when I was out there for Thanksgiving they asked me what I wanted. I couldn't think of anything to tell them [maybe that's the reason I never get anything good.] I can think of a lot of things that would be nice to have, but I wouldn't ask them for because they're too expensive [i.e. - HDTV, HD Video Camera, etc.] but I don't really NEED those things, either. I'm perfectly fine living my life without them. The ONE thing I really WANT, though, no one can really 'give' me. I want a boyfriend. Despite all the stuff I do to stay busy, most of it just serves to keep me busy, and quench only a small portion of my desire to associate with people. There's still that big part of me that really wants to love someone. But I'm too picky, I know. I want someone I find attractive [rare] and someone who values fitness and works out on a regular basis [almost non-existant among gay guys.] So yea... I never get what I want for Xmas, so it doesn't really matter what material stuff I ask for.

best bumper sticker ever!

2008-12-02T21:54:00.003-06:00

I saw this bumper sticker on the car I parked next to at the gym yesterday - I love it!

dumbest person ever? I'm voting for this guy...

2008-10-11T00:03:00.004-05:00

excerpt below from this article:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081011/ap_on_re_us/connecticut_gay_marriage

"Three justices issued separate dissenting opinions.
Justice Peter T. Zarella wrote that he believes there is no fundamental right to same-sex marriage, and that the court's majority failed to discuss the purpose of marriage laws, which he said is to "privilege and regulate procreative conduct."
Zarella added, "The ancient definition of marriage as the union of one man and one woman has its basis in biology, not bigotry. If the state no longer has an interest in the regulation of procreation, then that is a decision for the legislature or the people of the state and not this court."

{and now for my comments on that}

NO! You stupid fucking imbecile! It's never been the government's job to "regulate procreation." What the FUCK are you smoking?!?!?! If it were, the state would be issuing birth licenses not marriage licenses. Does this jackass really believe that somewhere in Connecticut state law it says the point of marriage is for making babies? What about infertile couples, women who had hysterectomies, or men who had vasectomies, or post-menopausal women. No marriage for them - since they're unable to procreate. And if marriage were really about "regulating procreation" then who decides who should or should not get married. What if two really hideously ugly people came in? Could they be denied because they shouldn't be making ugly babies? Or what if a dwarf came in? Could they be denied because that gene is heritable?

There's no sufficient amount of swear words that can accurately describe the complete and utter stupidity of this man...

life is good

2008-08-11T15:58:00.002-05:00

Some have said my blog posts here tend to only be negative. Well, in an attempt to turn the tide... here we go.

I am at a very good place in my life. No, things are not perfect, but the reality is that they never are, or if they are, they won't stay that way for long... But anyway, I'm happy. Sure, there are little things I wish were different, but by not sweating the small stuff I've achieved contentment.

I am busy almost every day of the week. If I'm not going to a meetup, then I'm meeting people for dinner, or movies, or they're coming over to hang out. I'm so busy that I barely have time to even do laundry or respond to email. So if you're feeling like I've forgotten you it's not intentional. You just need to call me up and get a spot on my calendar before it's taken by someone or something else. :)

This is exactly how and where I always wanted to be in my life. I love to be around people, socializing. I'm not a loaner, and during the times when I was involuntarily stuck by myself, alone and lonely, I wasn't happy. So, in my constant efforts to always be out making new friends - I've succeeded and now have a very full and active social life. I love it. Unfortunately now, in order to make room for more new people or old friends who occasionally want to get together I have to rearrange other things I could be doing. I have to prioritize my fun. :) I'd say that's a good position to be in.

some perspective

2008-06-26T17:42:00.003-05:00

ok - after a day or two and some contemplation, introspection and perspective I've decided that it was snotty of me to be angry at the guys who I talked about in my last post. They weren't into me - simple as that - I can't fault them for it because there have been quite a few guys who have shown interest in me and I was not interested back.

What I DO fault them for, however, is letting me be lead on and their way of ending it. Showing interest at first and then after a few weeks just ceasing to communicate is really rude. At least when I'm not into a guy who I know likes me, I let him know it. I don't let him think that there's potential when I know there's not. It's always hard when feelings are involved, but if any of these guys had just said "I know we've been 'hanging out' a lot lately, but I'd just like to be friends" I would have been totally cool with it.

thoughts

2008-06-24T20:49:00.011-05:00

I haven't posted a new blog in forever... either here or on my family friendly blog. Not that I didn't have lots of ideas between now and the last one I posted... just never made the time to sit down and write, so then I forgot what I was going to write about. Plus the fact that I feel like there's nobody out there reading this. At least on MySpace you can see how many views your blog has gotten, so you know if people are reading or not. Here, there is only the comments section to go by, so when there are no comments I just assume no one cares...

Anyway, I'm feeling a lot like no one cares about me again recently. I just got the brush off YET again for about the jillionth time. I was telling my friend Trent about it and in that conversation I created a term for these guys: "Monther." That's not "mother," but "month'er" because that's about the longest any of them actually last - a month. Then they're done with me and move on. Move on to what, I don't know... just something else, I guess. They're always out there hoping to find something better. I guess all I can do is wish them luck with that... since I know how much luck I've had with trying to date guys... a big fat ZERO!

I really, truly believe that I will never find anyone, and will be single for my whole life. I don't WANT that to be true, but I've fully accepted that as the cold hard reality of being a gay man.

Blatant Propaganda

2008-05-27T21:17:00.002-05:00

Today I was forwarded a blatant piece of propaganda by a family member and it immediately drew a comparison in my head to the anti-Jew propaganda Hitler proliferated leading up to WWII. Of course the Jews weren't out to dilute the Aryan race or take over the country or any of the many other lies the Nazis made up, but the propaganda certainly did its part to make enough of the German people believe that it was true to the point that Hitler got his way.

This propaganda I received was meant to proliferate the false idea that the U.S. Government and the atheists are out to remove God from any and all aspects of government. [In this case, by removing it from the design of the new dollar coins.] And even if they were, who cares? It's not the government's job to enforce a belief in God by all citizens - no matter how much the propagandist right wingers might think that's the case. [Also none of the government's business is the gender of the person I want to marry.]

I have pasted the text of the propaganda email I got below here, so you can all see for yourselves. Unfortunately I can't figure out how to get the original in all its tacky glory attached here complete with pictures and different font sizes, colors, and typefaces on each paragraph.

[start hyper-christian propaganda here]

Subject: Fw: DO NOT ACCEPT THE NEW DOLLAR COINS AS CHANGE
Please help do this... refuse to accept these when they are handed to you. I received one from the Post Office as change and I asked for a dollar bill instead. the lady just smiled and said 'way to go,' so she had read this e-mail. Please help out... our world is in enough trouble without this too!!!!!
U.S.Government to release new dollar coins...

You guessed it...
IN GOD WE TRUST IS GONE
If ever there was a reason to boycott something, THIS IS IT!!!!
DO NOT ACCEPT THE NEW DOLLAR COINS AS CHANGE
Together we can force them out of circulation.
Please send to all on your mail list !!!

[end hyped-christian propaganda]

What makes this worse is that it's not even true. They just moved the "In God We Trust" along with "E Pluribus Unum" to the outside edge of the coin. Thankfully my brother Snopes'd it so I didn't have to.

Some of my first thoughts after reading this hype were as follows:

"how many married guys stuffing dollar bills into a stripper's g-string see the 'in god we trust' on the bill and think twice about their wife and kids back home?"

OR

"how many druggies see the 'in god we trust' while rolling the bill up to snort their coke with pause to wonder where their life went wrong?"

OR

"how many hookers and/or pimps counting up their take for the night see 'in god we trust' on the money and decide to change their way of living?"

"uh, yea... zero." is the answer to all of those questions.

And what's the goal of this propaganda? Of all the problems facing our country, the one to worry about and have a shit-fit over is this one? Really? Dollar coins not having the word God on their face? THAT'S the biggest threat to our country? Somebody needs to get a frikken life!

sorry, but I don't feel one bit of sorry for you...

2008-05-09T23:56:00.002-05:00

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080509/ap_on_re_us/airport_death

So yea, this family deserves nothing. This woman was a stupid drunk and an addict. After living with an alcoholic for nearly 2 years I have absolutely NO sympathy for anyone with a "drinking problem." There's this thing called 'self-control' that can help you function as a normal, productive individual. I didn't invent it, it's actually been around for a while. People with drug and alcohol problems need to do some reasearch on self control and figure out how to implement it in their lives.

GAWD DAMN!

2008-05-09T18:52:00.002-05:00

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080509/ap_on_re_us/decaying_corpse

More fucking religious psychos - COMPLETELY out of their minds!!! And, of course, children in the home suffering untold amounts of psychological harm...

uhhhoorrr NOT...

2008-05-06T17:01:00.002-05:00

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080506/ap_on_re_us/church_children_seized

Dude, you're not the messiah. You're a nasty old pervert who needs a shave and a haircut. I hope your fellow prisoners give you the treatment you deserve.

standing invitations

2008-05-05T10:44:00.003-05:00

Every week there are a few things that you can be sure I'm going to do. Any and all of my friends are welcome to join me for any or all of these events. There is a permanent standing invitation for the following:

1. Naked Thursday - clothing optional day where I watch my favorite TV shows on NBC - My Name is Earl, The Office, and 30 Rock. Starts at 7pm.

2. Sunday Bike Ride - Depending on weather conditions - the ride will usually go around White Rock Lake and start time and location are flexible.

3. Sunday Night Cartoons - The Simpsons, Family Guy, and American Dad.

The following standing/open invitations will happen on an as accompanied basis [in other words: I always want to do this, but not alone, so if someone else wants to go with me, let me know and we'll make it happen]

1. Dinner - I like going out to a nice restaurant at least once in a while

2. Movies - There are a lot of cool movies coming out this summer and I haven't been seeing many lately because no one ever offers to go with me to them.

3. Naked Yoga - I like doing yoga a lot, and naked is the best way to do it, but I don't like going alone.

4. Galveston/Austin Road Trip - Everyone rags on Galveston, saying it "sucks." Well, yea, it's no Carribean Island, but you can drive there in less than 5 hours... and over the years I've had lots of fun trips there - I've got a lot of nostalgia connected with Galveston.

That's all I can think of for now, but if I remember more stuff I want people to join me for, I'll update. Basically this is a request for people to OFFER to hang out with me, instead of me having to beg and plead all the time. It constantly feels like nobody ever wants to do anything ever...

Also, as the TV season will be ending here in a few weeks, there won't be any new episodes of the shows I mentioned as standing invitations on Thursdays and Sundays, but there's still a standing invitation to come over either of those nights and hang out. We can play games, or watch movies, or just go swimming in the pool here at my apartment complex... Give me a call and let me know you're coming!

Tired bones

2008-04-22T15:37:00.003-05:00

You know how when you're sleeping you get a boner periodically thoughout the night? It's just part of the sleep process. Well, it happens when you're only half asleep, too. Or at least it does to me.

I am NOT a morning person. So having to get up early for work every day has taken a huge toll on me and I'm half asleep all day at work. Many times I have to fight to keep my eyes open. I have to get up and move around to keep from drifting off. It's extremely hard to focus and do accurate work [which is highly stressed here] when I'm so tired I can't even think. There are even times I go into dreams while still somewhat conscious. So pretty much every time I get up from my chair and go walking toward the bathroom, I get a boner. I guess my body - confused by sleepiness and glad that there's the circulatory help of movement instead of just sitting at a desk, just feels that's the appropriate response. Hopefully no one is noticing the bone in my pants. Sometimes I put my hands in my pockets to try to cover up the fact that I have a boner.

I can't figure out how anyone lives their life walking around with a cock ring on. But yet, I know about a bunch of gay guys who do so. I don't need anyone to notice my crotch. If I like a guy, that's not what I'm going to use to impress him.

AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

2008-04-17T19:21:00.002-05:00

Fucking stupid channel 5!!! One of the highlights of my week this week was going to be my favorite Thursday night TV shows, but NO, not now! There's a THUNDERSTORM!!! Like we've never had one of those before in Texas!!! God damn stupid motherfuckers. I got to see 5 minutes of My Name is Earl, and then they broke in with "coverage" of this storm which is causing hail, but no tornado - but possibly could make a tornado, but isn't... and they've been fucking talking about this SAME DAMN SHIT for 30 fucking minutes now!!! This storm is currently 40 miles WEST of Fort Worth, which is 40 miles west of me, making the storm 80 miles away, which equals guess what? I don't give a FUCKING DAMN!!! Show my TV show! Make the fucking weather alert on a different channel. GIVE ME A CHOICE. I know there are hailstorms and tornadoes in Texas in the spring... that's one of the fucking chances you take living here! What can you do about it? Abso-fucking-lutely NOTHING!!! All you can do is take cover - do we really need non-stop news coverage pre-empting MY favorite shows where all they do is say the same damn thing over and over - which basically just boils down to telling us your house is probably fucked? In a few HOURS when the storm gets here then I might close my sliding glass door. And if it gets so bad that I see shit flying through the air outside, then I might go into the closet and pull some blankets over me and go to sleep in there for the night. HONESTLY!!!! WTF!!! Show my damn shows!!! After about ten minutes of their bullshit I put the TV on mute because I couldn't stand to hear the same damn shit over and over. The only reason I didn't put it on mute immediately was that I was hoping the interruption would only be temporary and when the show came back on I wouldn't miss any of it. Nope... now it's past 7:30 and I've missed all of My Name is Earl, and judging from their bullshit so far I will likely miss ALL my shows tonight. Rest assured they will be receiving some virulent hate mail from me.

The Horrors of Craigslist

2008-04-06T09:04:00.002-05:00

Recently I've started perusing the ads in the "Men Seeking Men" section of Craigslist and been amazed by the horrors and delusions presented there. I'm not actually looking for sex, but kind of more a curiosity about what's going on there.

Here's an example of the delusion I came across yesterday. A man put his stats as follows:
5'10, 200, h/w p

So in other words, this person is my same height, but weighs over 50lbs MORE than me and yet still considers himself to be "height/weight proportionate." Uuhhhh, sorry there, but NO... you're FAT. To back up my assertion of that fatness I went to the CDC's BMI Calculator and put in those stats. Here's what it gave me:

Height: 5 feet, 10 inches
Weight: 200 pounds

Your BMI is 28.7, indicating your weight is in the overweight category for adults of your height.

BMI Weight Status
Below 18.5 - Underweight
18.5–24.9 - Normal
25.0–29.9 - Overweight
30.0 and Above - Obese

People who are overweight or obese are at higher risk for chronic conditions such as high blood pressure, diabetes, and high cholesterol. Anyone who is overweight should try to avoid gaining additional weight. Additionally, if you are overweight with other risk factors (such as high LDL cholesterol, low HDL cholesterol, or high blood pressure), you should try to lose weight. Even a small weight loss (just 10% of your current weight) may help lower the risk of disease. Talk with your healthcare provider to determine appropriate ways to lose weight.

So not only was the guy in the "overweight" category, he's just a few cartons of ben & jerry's short of the "obese" rating. Of course, that BMI rating can be faulty, since muscle weighs more than fat, you could potentially be one of those crazy muscley body builders and it would say you fall into the overweight category. However, judging from the fact that this man offered only a picture of his penis and nothing else, I'm going to say his body was nothing to be proud of.

lol

2008-04-05T10:38:00.002-05:00

Heh heh, was just reading some blogs on myspace and came across some super hilarious atheist pics:

You've crossed me for the last time, MySpace!

2008-04-05T09:08:00.001-05:00

This morning I was trying to post a blog on myspace, where I have been blogging for YEARS now, and of course, I got it all written and told it to post... and then... wait, wait, wait, wait... error message:

"Sorry! an unexpected error has occurred.This error has been forwarded to MySpace's technical group."

And everything I had written was gone. [It was a decidedly sassy post about delusional people who post ads on craiglist - which I will try to re-create here shortly.]

So I decided to come here and start two blogs actually - this one will be the "adult" blog, where I will write about my gay stuff and whatnot... and there will be another more G-rated, family friendly one that I will actually give my family memebers to read [since they're all Mormons and unequipped to deal with the realities of homosexuality.]