I saw this quote today and it's definitely something I need to learn and apply to myself:
If you limit your choices only to what seems possible or reasonable, you disconnect yourself from what you truly want, and all that is left is a compromise.
-Robert Fritz
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Pope? More like poop. lol
Not that I would ever give two shits about anything the Pope ever said, but this is a good article.
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
examining atheism
Tonight was a good night - I hung out with my sister and her family, and my friend Alicia came along with me. We had good food, and fun. I played Xmas hymns and we all sang. We got the boys all hyped up about Santa and Xmas and whatnot. Of course the subject of Jesus was at the forefront, being Xmas eve and all, and at one point in the evening Alicia and my sister both were talking about going to church and soundly assured me: "you'll be back." Of course, I've never been really good at debate, because I can't come up with the right response on the spot. All I could do was shake my head and disagree with them with my usual smile. That's very much why I prefer writing as a debate forum because it gives me the proper time I need to formulate a good response. Anyway, later I thought of what it was I should have come back to them with:
"Why would I go back? What does religion possibly have to offer me?" The whole time I was in my religion growing up I was not only deeply unhappy, but for my entire adolescence and into young adulthood I was totally suicidal. The only lasting feeling that the church and its teachings instilled in me was an intense and very real hatred of myself.
Suicide notwithstanding, what else does the church offer that I need? They offer to tell me who I am, what friends I should have, what I should or shouldn't do or think. They offer their control. That's basically it. "Give yourself to the church and we'll get you into heaven."
Well... what if I have enough knowledge of what's good and bad and the wisdom to exercise control over myself accordingly? What if I don't need to worry about whether I'll get into heaven or not - what if it's enough for me to just live a good life and be a good person? That means I don't need some old man's interpretation of a 2,000 year old storybook to tell me how to live my life. I'm smarter than that. The Mormon's argument, though is that they have a current prophet receiving revelation direct from God today. Uh, so... that's still some old man telling me who I am, when I already figured out that what they were feeding me all those years was not only damaging and wrong, but it was also complete BULLSHIT. It was only once I sat back from the table and took an honest assessment that I realized that's what I had been served my whole life, and I was tired of swallowing it. It was loathsome and disgusting and I kinda knew that all along, but because I had been trained since birth to just keep eating, I had kept trying to convince myself that I could do it and be happy. Well, just like eating shit in real life, there's no happy ending there. It will never make you feel good, and once you see it for what it really is you will NEVER go back to eating it again! So yea, I will definitely NOT be going back for another serving of that load of turd.
Now, with that said... I do not begrudge people their right to believe, or judge people for their belief. If it makes them happy and they find fulfillment in it, go right ahead and feast at that banquet. For you it may very well be the ambrosia that feeds and nourishes your soul. I wish happiness for all people, and if religion is where you find it then by all means, enjoy it. HOWEVER, don't try to "win me back" or to feel sorry for me, though, because I have never been happier. I absolutely LOVE living my life! [Something I would have never said while still a believer in the church.] Every day is a grand new adventure filled with endless possibilities. Yea, there's the mundane routine of a job that's "just work" but that doesn't get me down - it's a necessary part of life. There are bills that need to be paid. Hopefully I'll eventually transition into something more fulfilling as a career, and I'm working on that one little by little...
Anyway, the point is that I am accountable to no one but myself, and that's good enough. If I do something that wrongs someone else, I feel REALLY bad for it. Not because I'm worried about how God will judge me, but because I know that I should be better than that. Not because I'm worried about whether I'll get into heaven or not, but because of how I would feel if the tables were turned. There are good things taught in religion, which have been taught through all religions and outside of religion as well. The Christian version of it comes from Jesus and is most often quoted "do unto others as you would have done to you." That's my rule, and I like to say I do a pretty good job of following it most of the time. Most Christians believe Jesus made that one up - that he was the first one to think of that. Sorry - but just like the mythology on which Christianity is based, that one has been around a lot longer.
"Why would I go back? What does religion possibly have to offer me?" The whole time I was in my religion growing up I was not only deeply unhappy, but for my entire adolescence and into young adulthood I was totally suicidal. The only lasting feeling that the church and its teachings instilled in me was an intense and very real hatred of myself.
Suicide notwithstanding, what else does the church offer that I need? They offer to tell me who I am, what friends I should have, what I should or shouldn't do or think. They offer their control. That's basically it. "Give yourself to the church and we'll get you into heaven."
Well... what if I have enough knowledge of what's good and bad and the wisdom to exercise control over myself accordingly? What if I don't need to worry about whether I'll get into heaven or not - what if it's enough for me to just live a good life and be a good person? That means I don't need some old man's interpretation of a 2,000 year old storybook to tell me how to live my life. I'm smarter than that. The Mormon's argument, though is that they have a current prophet receiving revelation direct from God today. Uh, so... that's still some old man telling me who I am, when I already figured out that what they were feeding me all those years was not only damaging and wrong, but it was also complete BULLSHIT. It was only once I sat back from the table and took an honest assessment that I realized that's what I had been served my whole life, and I was tired of swallowing it. It was loathsome and disgusting and I kinda knew that all along, but because I had been trained since birth to just keep eating, I had kept trying to convince myself that I could do it and be happy. Well, just like eating shit in real life, there's no happy ending there. It will never make you feel good, and once you see it for what it really is you will NEVER go back to eating it again! So yea, I will definitely NOT be going back for another serving of that load of turd.
Now, with that said... I do not begrudge people their right to believe, or judge people for their belief. If it makes them happy and they find fulfillment in it, go right ahead and feast at that banquet. For you it may very well be the ambrosia that feeds and nourishes your soul. I wish happiness for all people, and if religion is where you find it then by all means, enjoy it. HOWEVER, don't try to "win me back" or to feel sorry for me, though, because I have never been happier. I absolutely LOVE living my life! [Something I would have never said while still a believer in the church.] Every day is a grand new adventure filled with endless possibilities. Yea, there's the mundane routine of a job that's "just work" but that doesn't get me down - it's a necessary part of life. There are bills that need to be paid. Hopefully I'll eventually transition into something more fulfilling as a career, and I'm working on that one little by little...
Anyway, the point is that I am accountable to no one but myself, and that's good enough. If I do something that wrongs someone else, I feel REALLY bad for it. Not because I'm worried about how God will judge me, but because I know that I should be better than that. Not because I'm worried about whether I'll get into heaven or not, but because of how I would feel if the tables were turned. There are good things taught in religion, which have been taught through all religions and outside of religion as well. The Christian version of it comes from Jesus and is most often quoted "do unto others as you would have done to you." That's my rule, and I like to say I do a pretty good job of following it most of the time. Most Christians believe Jesus made that one up - that he was the first one to think of that. Sorry - but just like the mythology on which Christianity is based, that one has been around a lot longer.
Friday, December 19, 2008
there's still time!
ok everyone - I saw a picture today of what I want for Xmas, so there's still time to get it for me! Here it is!
Friday, December 5, 2008
All I want for Xmas
As an Atheist, X-mas [which I'm perfectly happy to call Xmas - since I have no problem in {said with whiney Christian voice} "taking the Christ out of Christmas"] has little meaning to me. It stopped being fun a long time ago, when I stopped getting any more than one or two feeble presents. I still give stuff to people - mainly family - but the old adage " 'tis better to give than receive" really is just BS. Everyone loves to get stuff. My family has a gift exchange program whereby each 'family unit' gives to another. My sister in Arizona and her husband have my name and when I was out there for Thanksgiving they asked me what I wanted. I couldn't think of anything to tell them [maybe that's the reason I never get anything good.] I can think of a lot of things that would be nice to have, but I wouldn't ask them for because they're too expensive [i.e. - HDTV, HD Video Camera, etc.] but I don't really NEED those things, either. I'm perfectly fine living my life without them. The ONE thing I really WANT, though, no one can really 'give' me. I want a boyfriend. Despite all the stuff I do to stay busy, most of it just serves to keep me busy, and quench only a small portion of my desire to associate with people. There's still that big part of me that really wants to love someone. But I'm too picky, I know. I want someone I find attractive [rare] and someone who values fitness and works out on a regular basis [almost non-existant among gay guys.] So yea... I never get what I want for Xmas, so it doesn't really matter what material stuff I ask for.
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
best bumper sticker ever!
I saw this bumper sticker on the car I parked next to at the gym yesterday - I love it!
Saturday, October 11, 2008
dumbest person ever? I'm voting for this guy...
excerpt below from this article:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081011/ap_on_re_us/connecticut_gay_marriage
"Three justices issued separate dissenting opinions.
Justice Peter T. Zarella wrote that he believes there is no fundamental right to same-sex marriage, and that the court's majority failed to discuss the purpose of marriage laws, which he said is to "privilege and regulate procreative conduct."
Zarella added, "The ancient definition of marriage as the union of one man and one woman has its basis in biology, not bigotry. If the state no longer has an interest in the regulation of procreation, then that is a decision for the legislature or the people of the state and not this court."
{and now for my comments on that}
NO! You stupid fucking imbecile! It's never been the government's job to "regulate procreation." What the FUCK are you smoking?!?!?! If it were, the state would be issuing birth licenses not marriage licenses. Does this jackass really believe that somewhere in Connecticut state law it says the point of marriage is for making babies? What about infertile couples, women who had hysterectomies, or men who had vasectomies, or post-menopausal women. No marriage for them - since they're unable to procreate. And if marriage were really about "regulating procreation" then who decides who should or should not get married. What if two really hideously ugly people came in? Could they be denied because they shouldn't be making ugly babies? Or what if a dwarf came in? Could they be denied because that gene is heritable?
There's no sufficient amount of swear words that can accurately describe the complete and utter stupidity of this man...
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081011/ap_on_re_us/connecticut_gay_marriage
"Three justices issued separate dissenting opinions.
Justice Peter T. Zarella wrote that he believes there is no fundamental right to same-sex marriage, and that the court's majority failed to discuss the purpose of marriage laws, which he said is to "privilege and regulate procreative conduct."
Zarella added, "The ancient definition of marriage as the union of one man and one woman has its basis in biology, not bigotry. If the state no longer has an interest in the regulation of procreation, then that is a decision for the legislature or the people of the state and not this court."
{and now for my comments on that}
NO! You stupid fucking imbecile! It's never been the government's job to "regulate procreation." What the FUCK are you smoking?!?!?! If it were, the state would be issuing birth licenses not marriage licenses. Does this jackass really believe that somewhere in Connecticut state law it says the point of marriage is for making babies? What about infertile couples, women who had hysterectomies, or men who had vasectomies, or post-menopausal women. No marriage for them - since they're unable to procreate. And if marriage were really about "regulating procreation" then who decides who should or should not get married. What if two really hideously ugly people came in? Could they be denied because they shouldn't be making ugly babies? Or what if a dwarf came in? Could they be denied because that gene is heritable?
There's no sufficient amount of swear words that can accurately describe the complete and utter stupidity of this man...
Monday, August 11, 2008
life is good
Some have said my blog posts here tend to only be negative. Well, in an attempt to turn the tide... here we go.
I am at a very good place in my life. No, things are not perfect, but the reality is that they never are, or if they are, they won't stay that way for long... But anyway, I'm happy. Sure, there are little things I wish were different, but by not sweating the small stuff I've achieved contentment.
I am busy almost every day of the week. If I'm not going to a meetup, then I'm meeting people for dinner, or movies, or they're coming over to hang out. I'm so busy that I barely have time to even do laundry or respond to email. So if you're feeling like I've forgotten you it's not intentional. You just need to call me up and get a spot on my calendar before it's taken by someone or something else. :)
This is exactly how and where I always wanted to be in my life. I love to be around people, socializing. I'm not a loaner, and during the times when I was involuntarily stuck by myself, alone and lonely, I wasn't happy. So, in my constant efforts to always be out making new friends - I've succeeded and now have a very full and active social life. I love it. Unfortunately now, in order to make room for more new people or old friends who occasionally want to get together I have to rearrange other things I could be doing. I have to prioritize my fun. :) I'd say that's a good position to be in.
I am at a very good place in my life. No, things are not perfect, but the reality is that they never are, or if they are, they won't stay that way for long... But anyway, I'm happy. Sure, there are little things I wish were different, but by not sweating the small stuff I've achieved contentment.
I am busy almost every day of the week. If I'm not going to a meetup, then I'm meeting people for dinner, or movies, or they're coming over to hang out. I'm so busy that I barely have time to even do laundry or respond to email. So if you're feeling like I've forgotten you it's not intentional. You just need to call me up and get a spot on my calendar before it's taken by someone or something else. :)
This is exactly how and where I always wanted to be in my life. I love to be around people, socializing. I'm not a loaner, and during the times when I was involuntarily stuck by myself, alone and lonely, I wasn't happy. So, in my constant efforts to always be out making new friends - I've succeeded and now have a very full and active social life. I love it. Unfortunately now, in order to make room for more new people or old friends who occasionally want to get together I have to rearrange other things I could be doing. I have to prioritize my fun. :) I'd say that's a good position to be in.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
some perspective
ok - after a day or two and some contemplation, introspection and perspective I've decided that it was snotty of me to be angry at the guys who I talked about in my last post. They weren't into me - simple as that - I can't fault them for it because there have been quite a few guys who have shown interest in me and I was not interested back.
What I DO fault them for, however, is letting me be lead on and their way of ending it. Showing interest at first and then after a few weeks just ceasing to communicate is really rude. At least when I'm not into a guy who I know likes me, I let him know it. I don't let him think that there's potential when I know there's not. It's always hard when feelings are involved, but if any of these guys had just said "I know we've been 'hanging out' a lot lately, but I'd just like to be friends" I would have been totally cool with it.
What I DO fault them for, however, is letting me be lead on and their way of ending it. Showing interest at first and then after a few weeks just ceasing to communicate is really rude. At least when I'm not into a guy who I know likes me, I let him know it. I don't let him think that there's potential when I know there's not. It's always hard when feelings are involved, but if any of these guys had just said "I know we've been 'hanging out' a lot lately, but I'd just like to be friends" I would have been totally cool with it.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
thoughts
I haven't posted a new blog in forever... either here or on my family friendly blog. Not that I didn't have lots of ideas between now and the last one I posted... just never made the time to sit down and write, so then I forgot what I was going to write about. Plus the fact that I feel like there's nobody out there reading this. At least on MySpace you can see how many views your blog has gotten, so you know if people are reading or not. Here, there is only the comments section to go by, so when there are no comments I just assume no one cares...
Anyway, I'm feeling a lot like no one cares about me again recently. I just got the brush off YET again for about the jillionth time. I was telling my friend Trent about it and in that conversation I created a term for these guys: "Monther." That's not "mother," but "month'er" because that's about the longest any of them actually last - a month. Then they're done with me and move on. Move on to what, I don't know... just something else, I guess. They're always out there hoping to find something better. I guess all I can do is wish them luck with that... since I know how much luck I've had with trying to date guys... a big fat ZERO!
I really, truly believe that I will never find anyone, and will be single for my whole life. I don't WANT that to be true, but I've fully accepted that as the cold hard reality of being a gay man.
Anyway, I'm feeling a lot like no one cares about me again recently. I just got the brush off YET again for about the jillionth time. I was telling my friend Trent about it and in that conversation I created a term for these guys: "Monther." That's not "mother," but "month'er" because that's about the longest any of them actually last - a month. Then they're done with me and move on. Move on to what, I don't know... just something else, I guess. They're always out there hoping to find something better. I guess all I can do is wish them luck with that... since I know how much luck I've had with trying to date guys... a big fat ZERO!
I really, truly believe that I will never find anyone, and will be single for my whole life. I don't WANT that to be true, but I've fully accepted that as the cold hard reality of being a gay man.
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Blatant Propaganda
Today I was forwarded a blatant piece of propaganda by a family member and it immediately drew a comparison in my head to the anti-Jew propaganda Hitler proliferated leading up to WWII. Of course the Jews weren't out to dilute the Aryan race or take over the country or any of the many other lies the Nazis made up, but the propaganda certainly did its part to make enough of the German people believe that it was true to the point that Hitler got his way.
This propaganda I received was meant to proliferate the false idea that the U.S. Government and the atheists are out to remove God from any and all aspects of government. [In this case, by removing it from the design of the new dollar coins.] And even if they were, who cares? It's not the government's job to enforce a belief in God by all citizens - no matter how much the propagandist right wingers might think that's the case. [Also none of the government's business is the gender of the person I want to marry.]
I have pasted the text of the propaganda email I got below here, so you can all see for yourselves. Unfortunately I can't figure out how to get the original in all its tacky glory attached here complete with pictures and different font sizes, colors, and typefaces on each paragraph.
[start hyper-christian propaganda here]
Subject: Fw: DO NOT ACCEPT THE NEW DOLLAR COINS AS CHANGE
Please help do this... refuse to accept these when they are handed to you. I received one from the Post Office as change and I asked for a dollar bill instead. the lady just smiled and said 'way to go,' so she had read this e-mail. Please help out... our world is in enough trouble without this too!!!!!
U.S.Government to release new dollar coins...
You guessed it...
IN GOD WE TRUST IS GONE
If ever there was a reason to boycott something, THIS IS IT!!!!
DO NOT ACCEPT THE NEW DOLLAR COINS AS CHANGE
Together we can force them out of circulation.
Please send to all on your mail list !!!
[end hyped-christian propaganda]
What makes this worse is that it's not even true. They just moved the "In God We Trust" along with "E Pluribus Unum" to the outside edge of the coin. Thankfully my brother Snopes'd it so I didn't have to.
Some of my first thoughts after reading this hype were as follows:
"how many married guys stuffing dollar bills into a stripper's g-string see the 'in god we trust' on the bill and think twice about their wife and kids back home?"
OR
"how many druggies see the 'in god we trust' while rolling the bill up to snort their coke with pause to wonder where their life went wrong?"
OR
"how many hookers and/or pimps counting up their take for the night see 'in god we trust' on the money and decide to change their way of living?"
"uh, yea... zero." is the answer to all of those questions.
And what's the goal of this propaganda? Of all the problems facing our country, the one to worry about and have a shit-fit over is this one? Really? Dollar coins not having the word God on their face? THAT'S the biggest threat to our country? Somebody needs to get a frikken life!
This propaganda I received was meant to proliferate the false idea that the U.S. Government and the atheists are out to remove God from any and all aspects of government. [In this case, by removing it from the design of the new dollar coins.] And even if they were, who cares? It's not the government's job to enforce a belief in God by all citizens - no matter how much the propagandist right wingers might think that's the case. [Also none of the government's business is the gender of the person I want to marry.]
I have pasted the text of the propaganda email I got below here, so you can all see for yourselves. Unfortunately I can't figure out how to get the original in all its tacky glory attached here complete with pictures and different font sizes, colors, and typefaces on each paragraph.
[start hyper-christian propaganda here]
Subject: Fw: DO NOT ACCEPT THE NEW DOLLAR COINS AS CHANGE
Please help do this... refuse to accept these when they are handed to you. I received one from the Post Office as change and I asked for a dollar bill instead. the lady just smiled and said 'way to go,' so she had read this e-mail. Please help out... our world is in enough trouble without this too!!!!!
U.S.Government to release new dollar coins...
You guessed it...
IN GOD WE TRUST IS GONE
If ever there was a reason to boycott something, THIS IS IT!!!!
DO NOT ACCEPT THE NEW DOLLAR COINS AS CHANGE
Together we can force them out of circulation.
Please send to all on your mail list !!!
[end hyped-christian propaganda]
What makes this worse is that it's not even true. They just moved the "In God We Trust" along with "E Pluribus Unum" to the outside edge of the coin. Thankfully my brother Snopes'd it so I didn't have to.
Some of my first thoughts after reading this hype were as follows:
"how many married guys stuffing dollar bills into a stripper's g-string see the 'in god we trust' on the bill and think twice about their wife and kids back home?"
OR
"how many druggies see the 'in god we trust' while rolling the bill up to snort their coke with pause to wonder where their life went wrong?"
OR
"how many hookers and/or pimps counting up their take for the night see 'in god we trust' on the money and decide to change their way of living?"
"uh, yea... zero." is the answer to all of those questions.
And what's the goal of this propaganda? Of all the problems facing our country, the one to worry about and have a shit-fit over is this one? Really? Dollar coins not having the word God on their face? THAT'S the biggest threat to our country? Somebody needs to get a frikken life!
Monday, May 5, 2008
standing invitations
Every week there are a few things that you can be sure I'm going to do. Any and all of my friends are welcome to join me for any or all of these events. There is a permanent standing invitation for the following:
1. Naked Thursday - clothing optional day where I watch my favorite TV shows on NBC - My Name is Earl, The Office, and 30 Rock. Starts at 7pm.
2. Sunday Bike Ride - Depending on weather conditions - the ride will usually go around White Rock Lake and start time and location are flexible.
3. Sunday Night Cartoons - The Simpsons, Family Guy, and American Dad.
The following standing/open invitations will happen on an as accompanied basis [in other words: I always want to do this, but not alone, so if someone else wants to go with me, let me know and we'll make it happen]
1. Dinner - I like going out to a nice restaurant at least once in a while
2. Movies - There are a lot of cool movies coming out this summer and I haven't been seeing many lately because no one ever offers to go with me to them.
3. Naked Yoga - I like doing yoga a lot, and naked is the best way to do it, but I don't like going alone.
4. Galveston/Austin Road Trip - Everyone rags on Galveston, saying it "sucks." Well, yea, it's no Carribean Island, but you can drive there in less than 5 hours... and over the years I've had lots of fun trips there - I've got a lot of nostalgia connected with Galveston.
That's all I can think of for now, but if I remember more stuff I want people to join me for, I'll update. Basically this is a request for people to OFFER to hang out with me, instead of me having to beg and plead all the time. It constantly feels like nobody ever wants to do anything ever...
Also, as the TV season will be ending here in a few weeks, there won't be any new episodes of the shows I mentioned as standing invitations on Thursdays and Sundays, but there's still a standing invitation to come over either of those nights and hang out. We can play games, or watch movies, or just go swimming in the pool here at my apartment complex... Give me a call and let me know you're coming!
1. Naked Thursday - clothing optional day where I watch my favorite TV shows on NBC - My Name is Earl, The Office, and 30 Rock. Starts at 7pm.
2. Sunday Bike Ride - Depending on weather conditions - the ride will usually go around White Rock Lake and start time and location are flexible.
3. Sunday Night Cartoons - The Simpsons, Family Guy, and American Dad.
The following standing/open invitations will happen on an as accompanied basis [in other words: I always want to do this, but not alone, so if someone else wants to go with me, let me know and we'll make it happen]
1. Dinner - I like going out to a nice restaurant at least once in a while
2. Movies - There are a lot of cool movies coming out this summer and I haven't been seeing many lately because no one ever offers to go with me to them.
3. Naked Yoga - I like doing yoga a lot, and naked is the best way to do it, but I don't like going alone.
4. Galveston/Austin Road Trip - Everyone rags on Galveston, saying it "sucks." Well, yea, it's no Carribean Island, but you can drive there in less than 5 hours... and over the years I've had lots of fun trips there - I've got a lot of nostalgia connected with Galveston.
That's all I can think of for now, but if I remember more stuff I want people to join me for, I'll update. Basically this is a request for people to OFFER to hang out with me, instead of me having to beg and plead all the time. It constantly feels like nobody ever wants to do anything ever...
Also, as the TV season will be ending here in a few weeks, there won't be any new episodes of the shows I mentioned as standing invitations on Thursdays and Sundays, but there's still a standing invitation to come over either of those nights and hang out. We can play games, or watch movies, or just go swimming in the pool here at my apartment complex... Give me a call and let me know you're coming!
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Tired bones
You know how when you're sleeping you get a boner periodically thoughout the night? It's just part of the sleep process. Well, it happens when you're only half asleep, too. Or at least it does to me.
I am NOT a morning person. So having to get up early for work every day has taken a huge toll on me and I'm half asleep all day at work. Many times I have to fight to keep my eyes open. I have to get up and move around to keep from drifting off. It's extremely hard to focus and do accurate work [which is highly stressed here] when I'm so tired I can't even think. There are even times I go into dreams while still somewhat conscious. So pretty much every time I get up from my chair and go walking toward the bathroom, I get a boner. I guess my body - confused by sleepiness and glad that there's the circulatory help of movement instead of just sitting at a desk, just feels that's the appropriate response. Hopefully no one is noticing the bone in my pants. Sometimes I put my hands in my pockets to try to cover up the fact that I have a boner.
I can't figure out how anyone lives their life walking around with a cock ring on. But yet, I know about a bunch of gay guys who do so. I don't need anyone to notice my crotch. If I like a guy, that's not what I'm going to use to impress him.
I am NOT a morning person. So having to get up early for work every day has taken a huge toll on me and I'm half asleep all day at work. Many times I have to fight to keep my eyes open. I have to get up and move around to keep from drifting off. It's extremely hard to focus and do accurate work [which is highly stressed here] when I'm so tired I can't even think. There are even times I go into dreams while still somewhat conscious. So pretty much every time I get up from my chair and go walking toward the bathroom, I get a boner. I guess my body - confused by sleepiness and glad that there's the circulatory help of movement instead of just sitting at a desk, just feels that's the appropriate response. Hopefully no one is noticing the bone in my pants. Sometimes I put my hands in my pockets to try to cover up the fact that I have a boner.
I can't figure out how anyone lives their life walking around with a cock ring on. But yet, I know about a bunch of gay guys who do so. I don't need anyone to notice my crotch. If I like a guy, that's not what I'm going to use to impress him.
Thursday, April 17, 2008
AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
Fucking stupid channel 5!!! One of the highlights of my week this week was going to be my favorite Thursday night TV shows, but NO, not now! There's a THUNDERSTORM!!! Like we've never had one of those before in Texas!!! God damn stupid motherfuckers. I got to see 5 minutes of My Name is Earl, and then they broke in with "coverage" of this storm which is causing hail, but no tornado - but possibly could make a tornado, but isn't... and they've been fucking talking about this SAME DAMN SHIT for 30 fucking minutes now!!! This storm is currently 40 miles WEST of Fort Worth, which is 40 miles west of me, making the storm 80 miles away, which equals guess what? I don't give a FUCKING DAMN!!! Show my TV show! Make the fucking weather alert on a different channel. GIVE ME A CHOICE. I know there are hailstorms and tornadoes in Texas in the spring... that's one of the fucking chances you take living here! What can you do about it? Abso-fucking-lutely NOTHING!!! All you can do is take cover - do we really need non-stop news coverage pre-empting MY favorite shows where all they do is say the same damn thing over and over - which basically just boils down to telling us your house is probably fucked? In a few HOURS when the storm gets here then I might close my sliding glass door. And if it gets so bad that I see shit flying through the air outside, then I might go into the closet and pull some blankets over me and go to sleep in there for the night. HONESTLY!!!! WTF!!! Show my damn shows!!! After about ten minutes of their bullshit I put the TV on mute because I couldn't stand to hear the same damn shit over and over. The only reason I didn't put it on mute immediately was that I was hoping the interruption would only be temporary and when the show came back on I wouldn't miss any of it. Nope... now it's past 7:30 and I've missed all of My Name is Earl, and judging from their bullshit so far I will likely miss ALL my shows tonight. Rest assured they will be receiving some virulent hate mail from me.
Sunday, April 6, 2008
The Horrors of Craigslist
Recently I've started perusing the ads in the "Men Seeking Men" section of Craigslist and been amazed by the horrors and delusions presented there. I'm not actually looking for sex, but kind of more a curiosity about what's going on there.
Here's an example of the delusion I came across yesterday. A man put his stats as follows:
5'10, 200, h/w p
So in other words, this person is my same height, but weighs over 50lbs MORE than me and yet still considers himself to be "height/weight proportionate." Uuhhhh, sorry there, but NO... you're FAT. To back up my assertion of that fatness I went to the CDC's BMI Calculator and put in those stats. Here's what it gave me:
Height: 5 feet, 10 inches
Weight: 200 pounds
Your BMI is 28.7, indicating your weight is in the overweight category for adults of your height.
BMI Weight Status
Below 18.5 - Underweight
18.5–24.9 - Normal
25.0–29.9 - Overweight
30.0 and Above - Obese
People who are overweight or obese are at higher risk for chronic conditions such as high blood pressure, diabetes, and high cholesterol. Anyone who is overweight should try to avoid gaining additional weight. Additionally, if you are overweight with other risk factors (such as high LDL cholesterol, low HDL cholesterol, or high blood pressure), you should try to lose weight. Even a small weight loss (just 10% of your current weight) may help lower the risk of disease. Talk with your healthcare provider to determine appropriate ways to lose weight.
So not only was the guy in the "overweight" category, he's just a few cartons of ben & jerry's short of the "obese" rating. Of course, that BMI rating can be faulty, since muscle weighs more than fat, you could potentially be one of those crazy muscley body builders and it would say you fall into the overweight category. However, judging from the fact that this man offered only a picture of his penis and nothing else, I'm going to say his body was nothing to be proud of.
Here's an example of the delusion I came across yesterday. A man put his stats as follows:
5'10, 200, h/w p
So in other words, this person is my same height, but weighs over 50lbs MORE than me and yet still considers himself to be "height/weight proportionate." Uuhhhh, sorry there, but NO... you're FAT. To back up my assertion of that fatness I went to the CDC's BMI Calculator and put in those stats. Here's what it gave me:
Height: 5 feet, 10 inches
Weight: 200 pounds
Your BMI is 28.7, indicating your weight is in the overweight category for adults of your height.
BMI Weight Status
Below 18.5 - Underweight
18.5–24.9 - Normal
25.0–29.9 - Overweight
30.0 and Above - Obese
People who are overweight or obese are at higher risk for chronic conditions such as high blood pressure, diabetes, and high cholesterol. Anyone who is overweight should try to avoid gaining additional weight. Additionally, if you are overweight with other risk factors (such as high LDL cholesterol, low HDL cholesterol, or high blood pressure), you should try to lose weight. Even a small weight loss (just 10% of your current weight) may help lower the risk of disease. Talk with your healthcare provider to determine appropriate ways to lose weight.
So not only was the guy in the "overweight" category, he's just a few cartons of ben & jerry's short of the "obese" rating. Of course, that BMI rating can be faulty, since muscle weighs more than fat, you could potentially be one of those crazy muscley body builders and it would say you fall into the overweight category. However, judging from the fact that this man offered only a picture of his penis and nothing else, I'm going to say his body was nothing to be proud of.
Saturday, April 5, 2008
lol
Heh heh, was just reading some blogs on myspace and came across some super hilarious atheist pics:
You've crossed me for the last time, MySpace!
This morning I was trying to post a blog on myspace, where I have been blogging for YEARS now, and of course, I got it all written and told it to post... and then... wait, wait, wait, wait... error message:
"Sorry! an unexpected error has occurred.This error has been forwarded to MySpace's technical group."
And everything I had written was gone. [It was a decidedly sassy post about delusional people who post ads on craiglist - which I will try to re-create here shortly.]
So I decided to come here and start two blogs actually - this one will be the "adult" blog, where I will write about my gay stuff and whatnot... and there will be another more G-rated, family friendly one that I will actually give my family memebers to read [since they're all Mormons and unequipped to deal with the realities of homosexuality.]
"Sorry! an unexpected error has occurred.This error has been forwarded to MySpace's technical group."
And everything I had written was gone. [It was a decidedly sassy post about delusional people who post ads on craiglist - which I will try to re-create here shortly.]
So I decided to come here and start two blogs actually - this one will be the "adult" blog, where I will write about my gay stuff and whatnot... and there will be another more G-rated, family friendly one that I will actually give my family memebers to read [since they're all Mormons and unequipped to deal with the realities of homosexuality.]
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